I was on the phone the other day with my husband, talking about some upcoming plans. As we compared our thoughts about the plans, we realized that we had very different perspectives on them. This is usually the case. As a rule, my husband and I see things from completely different points of view. I don’t know if it’s the male-female thing, or differences in upbringing. But I’ve come to expect it!

 

This time though, when I gave my take on the plan and acknowledged that I probably was a little different in my thinking, he said something that made me stop in my tracks. He called me “weird”. It wasn’t in a negative way, more an offhanded comment, noting that I often have a unique way of thinking and doing things, at least from his perspective. But it made me think:

Am I weird?

 

 

When I was a kid, being called weird was an insult. No one wanted to be the weird kid – being different and unique wasn’t a compliment! It’s funny though, after decades of being an adult and learning to be myself and embrace the exclusively individual parts of myself, being called weird still sounded a little negative. It’s strange, because when I go to cities like Austin, TX or Asheville, NC that take great pride in being weird, I love being there. It’s the different parts that make those places interesting and fun!

Being called weird made me start asking the question: If I’m weird, then what makes me that way? It didn’t take two seconds before my brain started offering me answers. I eat in a way that lots of people find strange, with no animal products and mostly whole and unprocessed foods. I like to cook, where many people do not. I wear my hair natural without chemicals. Even though I have plenty to do raising four kids, running a household, and working as a physician, I still write this blog every week and make videos for my YouTube channel (check me out at Dr Andrea Christian Parks). With the support of my husband and a teacher, I’ve been homeschooling my kids for eight years, even though sending them to public school would be easier and cheaper. I enjoy doing surgery – many people don’t want to see inside live people’s bodies. I am committed to growing my relationship with God on a personal and daily basis and have been for more than two decades. These things, among others, are things that certainly could be considered weird.

 

 

But so what? What if I am weird? Being weird now isn’t the insult that it was in fifth grade. One thing I started realizing during my coaching work this week is that the people that I learned the most from and admired in my formative years were “weird” people. They were unique and different and stayed that way even when they were criticized for it. I was attracted to the power and character in people who could be who they were even when others didn’t see their value. I wanted to be like them!

I had a friend named Thea from elementary through high school who was always very different. She wore homemade clothes when that was absolutely not cool. She had Doc Maarten boots before they were a thing. I’ll never forget the skirt she wore made of her dad’s old neckties. She liked the skirt and couldn’t care less if anyone else did. And that was the point: She liked herself and her style, so if others didn’t, then they were entitled to their opinions. It wasn’t important enough to change how she showed up. She was fun, interesting, loyal, smart and talented. I’m glad I had the opportunity to be her friend!

 

Different and cool…

 

When I look back over my life, people like Thea were the ones I wanted as friends, women who were clear about who they were, what they believed, and were comfortable in themselves. They were able to be good friends and accept other people because they had already figured out who they were. They didn’t need friends who were the same to confirm them, because they’d already done that work. They would be themselves and let you be you – they saw the value that you brought to the friendship. I’ve had so many friends like this over the years, and the best thing about having that kind of friend was this: I got to become me. I didn’t need to pretend to be other than me to please my friends, and that allowed me to figure out who I wanted to be. Now before I make this sound too idyllic, I certainly have things that I’m undoing in my self and my character. Plenty of things. But if at one time I thought being weird was a negative thing, I don’t know that I ever really believed it, because look at who I chose as friends! And if I love “weird” people and I’m weird, then maybe it’s not a bad thing at all. Maybe my being weird is the gift I get to give to the world.

 

I love gifts – never know what’s inside, but it’s fun to find out!

 

And you? Maybe you like to do things with your kids that seem a little strange to others. It might be that you have a love for knitting that no one knows about. You might be growing your own food and canning it at the end of the growing season (come teach me!). You may love cutting your own grass and planting flowers in your yard. Whatever it is that makes your heart sing, that thing that makes you different, that’s the thing that you have to give to the world. It’s the thing that other people get to admire about you, so don’t hide it. It may be “weird”, but it’s authentically you and worth celebrating. So be your unique, different, weird self – you’re what makes life wonderful. Go be a gift!

 

What is it about you that’s weird? I want to know you better, so please share in the comments below!